I’ve always been the sort of person who likes to improve herself; and make the best effort at whatever new project I put my mind to. I think it is important to try, try, try again – whether it would be learning to play the spoons, or experimenting with Feng Shui arrangements in the lounge room. And as people have always told me, since I was little: “Susan, you are very trying.” And then they’d sigh and roll their eyes, as I presume they would think what a wonderful achiever I am and how on earth did they get the privilege of knowing me.

So the latest self-improvement task I have embarked upon is waiting for my hands to dry when using a hot air blower in public toilets. I’m sure you would be familiar with the machines attached to many a grimy wall in the toilets of shopping centres all across the country. The old fashioned ones are a chunky white contraption with a rounded chrome outlet that pushes out hot air quite noisily. This is the sort of device that can be manipulated to shoot air in any direction, as long as the chrome outlet swings around easily. I’ve seen it used to dry off peoples’ armpits as well as wet hair from being caught in the rain. Sometimes the wet hair has been in someone's armpit.

The newer models are more streamlined and have a slotted vent in the base of the machine, usually with a sensor that switches the air flow on and off according to the presence of some waiting hands. These are tricky to use, as often your hand has to be in just the correct position, and your tongue held between your teeth just so, in order for the air to consistently come out. These are a challenge to your faith in hand dryers as the air is so feeble you wonder if it could possibly have any effect at all. But regardless of the type of dryer, the test is to wait long enough for your hands to dry. Patience is a virtue, so I am told.

I remember yonks ago when Lady Diana became the wife of Prince Charles, and thus Princess of Wales. Women’s magazines loved to talk about the rise of this demure kindergarten teacher to royalty. One article elaborated on how Princess Diana developed her gentle demeanour. One thing that struck me as a trifle odd was that Diana claimed to choose the longest line at the supermarket, making it a habit to practise waiting patiently. Clearly a woman with way too much time on her hands. Or so you might think.

There are many sayings on the benefits of taking your time and being patient: Fools rush in where angels fear to tread. Don’t count your chickens before they hatch. Look both ways before you cross the road. I’ve been waiting for a girl like you, to come into my life… Oh, hang on, that’s an 80’s song by Foreigner.

I remember a funny incident from when I was in high school. My friend Tanya and I were running late for our next subject, after racing across from the other side of school. We put our bags on top of the port racks and got out our books and pencil cases. Tanya (being a tad more enthusiastic about maths than I was) darted into the room while I took my time to organise my belongings. Within a matter of seconds she bounced out again, her face flushed. It was the wrong class. We’d forgotten that our rooms had been changed around. The image of Tanya running into a room full of strange kids staring at this lunatic interrupting their lesson, made me laugh. Oh, to be wise and wait.

Back to the story.

Sometimes there are two options to dry your hands – paper towel and the air dryer. Those who hurriedly wipe their hands with paper towel are watched longingly as you wait with your hands offered pleadingly to the machine. The paper towel people are out the door before you’ve even begun to get the air to turn on for more than 5 seconds at a time. But good things come to those who wait. You wipe your hands together and imagine that you can feel the water evaporating from your skin. But in reality, it doesn’t happen that way. Your hands seem to be wet for a whole, I dunno, 57 minutes, then unexpectedly, you feel dryness on a portion of your fingers, and then all of a sudden the skin is completely parched. It’s a miracle! you think, and then you can head out the door as well. Unfortunately it’s taken so long to dry your hands you need to use the toilet again.

But as for my self-development activities, since doing some internet research, I just may rethink my choice of training tasks. According to the wikipedia, studies show that using paper towels result in a decrease in bacteria on your skin. Sadly, the air dryers increase bacteria by at least 100% and even spread bacteria around the room. Euwww! So much for improving myself. Perhaps I’ll try something else to challenge my patience. Like watching my husband struggle to open a plastic freezer bag without interfering. Or sit quietly while knowing that the box of chocolates on the kitchen bench is calling my name. That’s not only patience, that’s a big mob of self-control.

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